I've been watching Ugly Helen

I've sat down to watch the new series of Ugly Betty, and I remember how my life is quite similar to Ugly Betty's however none of the good stuff happens.


We both had braces, admittedly I only had mine on for a year and a half; I'd say our hair is similar in thickness. I don't have glasses, I don't have a job in a publishing house, however much I wish I'm still not latino, my mother is still alive, steve is definitely not an illegal chef from mexico, I haven't got a billionaire boyfriend and I really can't remember why I thought I was Ugly Betty. 


I generally think I was just feeling sorry for myself at the time, which is also the phase I'm going through now. I also think I go through phases of watching television programs and relating to the main character; I remember when my dream was to be a vampire slayer (my love for Buffy is so strong I think I will always want to be a vampire slayer), I've researched the qualifications I need to become a crime scene investigator and I'm still keeping an eye out for my own Tony Soprano. 


I can't get enough of getting angry with life. I'm irritated with the decisions I've made, I can't stand the fact we have to choose our paths at such a young age, and because I was completely lost and had no direction I have ruined most of my chances of a good income. Every internship has "graduate" stamped all over it. I'm not a fan of graduates. I apologise in advance if I take this out personally on any of my friends/acquaintances.


I'm scared of this part, when I get angry I get impatient, when I get impatient I make rash decisions. I'm currently looking at several jobs abroad, where I would get accommodation and have to move for at least a year.  And I've applied for them!


I feel because I didn't go to University I've missed out and I want to move out, go traveling, see the world, meet amazing people, anything just to get out of the house and stop watching atrocious reality TV programs! I can't stop myself from watching "Keeping Up With The Kardashians". Which is probably why I'm feeling ugly, they seem to wake up with full makeup and extensions; and the last week I've been waking up with a ridiculously red face and shed loads of skin crumbling off. (I'm still paying for the UV lamp incident, it became so severe I had to go to the GP and get steroid creams, I'm undecided wether I want to post photos; they're pretty dodgy. Aqueous cream was my best friend, although smearing it over my face every few hours has made me all spotty again, totally backfiring on my plan to use the UV lamp to clear my spots. Life is lovely and sweet.)